Thursday, April 24, 2014

Day 48-51 April 21-24

April 21 - Food finickiness continues.  I think it is because of herbs.  I will stop putting them on his food.
April 22 - Only ate half his dinner.

April 23 PVC 23
I had a chat with out vet.  He asked me what I was thinking. I told him I try not to think.. LOL
I am on the correct logical track in his opinion.  No transfusion will help.  He stated it is a waste of money .  And Jake wouldn't want his last day to be in a vet office.

Now we are on quality of life walk.... *tears*

Keeping on our bucket list - live every day as your last...
Late last night - scary late - I drove him to Tanner. I just walked him thru the wooded entrance. and a few steps down the hill.  He had to stop. You could see in his eyes he wanted to go further, to run.  However his body stopped him.  To see that want in his eye and then to see his once able, highly athletic body unable to take a few more steps - *CRUSHED my heart*

Recent notes on the last few days

  • He is having a harder and harder time getting into E and using steps at back door.  he fell a few times now.
  • His tail still wags when I sing him his song.
  • He refused Peanut Butter
  • There is about 3 hour sleep increments at night.  He has to urinate about 3 times a night.  I'd wake up 10 times for him.
  • He still sits up on his rides
  • He will follow me eventually
  • I am worried about Zoe.  She is losing her the dog she shadows.  She also lost Sneek.  maybe I really don't need to worry about the Sneek loss.  But the Jake.. Her and I will work thru it together.  
  • I follow him around from room to room at night.
  • Emily is moving out and taking Sneek with her.  I'll miss them both. However, I believe it is for the highest and best good for all involved.  Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.
  • I can leave the door to my office open and he just stays under my desk.
  • I lost an amazing video of him and Zoe at the canyon last year.  I am hoping to recover.
  • My nightmares continue. Most are about Jake, death, friendships, people going away.  It is fitting for what is going on in my life today....

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